Some things in life you have to learn only by doing them wrong the first time; relationships and that sort of thing. Other things you learn by being taught by someone, like learning to drive. Then there are those things which you should just intrinsically know such as not turning your back, even for a moment, on a patient strapped to a gurney on wheels.
The paramedic probably realised this as I began to roll down the hill. I imagine as an educated man his grasp of the English language was quite commanding. His selection of words as he tripped over his own feet trying to catch hold of the rolling torpedo of death which my hospital bed had now become was simple though. “Shit, shit, shit! Oh, fucking shit!” he yelled as I rolled beyond his grasp. “Yeah,” I thought. “That about sums it up.”
I was starting to pick up some speed now. The sky was rolling past my gaze with increasing rapidity. I looked to my side and saw a woman scream and drop her shopping bags, which I felt was an interesting if unhelpful reaction.
A real hero burst onto the scene after this. Was he really wearing a superman shirt or did I just imagine it? It certainly fit with his magnificent dive as he tried to grab hold of the gurney. But alas he only succeeded in spinning me around. At least now I could watch the cavalcade of terrified people chasing after me. Annoyingly they seemed to be getting further away from me.
As I flipped over the headboard to land face down on the memory foam mattress I decided that whoever had built the bed shop at the bottom of the hill was most assuredly a saint.